Published: August 4, 2008
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EmailAbout once a month, Kara Richardson sorts through her kids’ toys with a cleansing system based on a philosophy of “no remorse.”
Most toys and games with missing or broken pieces go, especially if they cost less than $25. So do cheap items from fast food restaurants and party favors that her children haven’t played with in weeks. Toys with lots of small parts – those little pieces that seem to multiply relentlessly and scatter all over her Poquoson home – tend to be very fair game.
“Having too many toys that are disorganized and serve no purpose makes it hard for children to select the toys that they can still use in a meaningful way,” said Richardson, a mother of four and owner of the professional cleaning business Two Girls & A Mop Inc., which counts many parents as customers. “Don’t feel guilty, because with that brings resistance. When you stop even for a moment to feel guilty, you will keep so many things you really should have put in the trash. Guilt equals clutter!”
Kids themselves, of course, also equal clutter. But parents can bring the chaos under better control with some fairly simple changes and rules, experts say.
Not surprisingly, the best way to prevent clutter is to not get too much stuff to begin with, said Jane Patefield, owner of the Newport News-based company Organize This. A few good-quality outfits, for example, are better than overflowing drawers of cheap T-shirts that a child will never get through between laundry loads. A handful of well-made, interactive toys and games are just as valuable, and borrowed library books are good alternatives to bookstore shopping sprees.
“In this business, I’ve really seen that people have too many things,” said Patefield, who does design work and helps people bring order to their homes. “You can’t keep rearranging things – there’s only so much you can do. It’s better to try to live a little more simply.”
Luckily, there’s still hope for homes that are already packed. One of Patefield’s immediate suggestions is to put toys in plastic bins and rotate them. Bins not in use can go in a closet, a room off-limits to kids or even the trunk of a car. “Don’t have too much out at once,” she said. “That will also make the toys that are available more interesting to the child.”
Another good trick is the “clean as you go” rule, said Debbie Williams, a professional organizing strategist and owner of the Texas-based company Let’s Get It Together. That means children have to put away toys as soon as they’re finished playing with them – and before they can get out a new toy. Williams also recommends limiting the number of items a child can have out at any one time – say, to three or four –to help them focus and make clean-up less of a hassle.
“‘Clean as you go’ works wonders for kids of all ages, teaching them to not only put away things when they finish using them, but to create a HOME for those items so that they can find them easier,” she said. “When each child practices this rule, it makes less clutter and saves time after projects or play-time is over.”
The way parents store toys can make a huge difference as well, said Williams, a mother and former kindergarten teacher. Assigning specific locations to each toy – outside or inside, upstairs or downstairs, playroom or bedroom – contains clutter by keeping items in the places they’re used most. Playrooms or bedroom corners, for example, are perfect spots for Lego building projects that may need to stay in place for a few days and would quickly mess up a living room.
Williams strongly favors shelves, clear plastic tubs and shoe boxes over toy boxes, where things end up in disorganized piles. Once inside, toys are tough to see and easily broken, especially if they land at the bottom of the heap.
“With shelves, everything has a place and you can easily see where it goes,” she said. “Use labels on tubs with handles or find clear ones to take the mystery out of what’s inside. Keep things easy to use, on their level, and you'll be amazed at how quickly they’ll learn to clear the clutter!”
Creativity can help with space issues. Old shoe boxes are perfect spots for small items such as Lego pieces, Barbie accessories and cars. Homemade wall hammocks, rigged with such materials as mosquito netting or big beach towels, can be homes for stuffed animals. Out-of-season clothes can go into plastic tubs that slide under a child’s bed rather than jamming up closets.
Clearing clutter also requires regular clearing out. Donating toys, puzzles, stuffed animals and clothes to a charity or thrift store such as Goodwill, the Salvation Army or Disabled American Veterans can be a lesson in compassion for kids (and cut down on parental guilt for parting with piles of unused stuff). Most of those organizations also welcome many other items, including old Halloween costumes and holiday outfits, used sporting equipment, cribs, high chairs and videos.
“Who doesn’t have a Barney movie lying around and their kids have moved on to Dora or Ninja Turtles?” said Joy Litton, assistant district manager for Children’s Hospital of the King’s Daughters Thrift Stores, which has 22 locations in Hampton Roads. “But for another child, that Barney video is just right. Your kids can know that they’re giving and helping somebody else.”
If parents aren’t sure an organization will want a particular item, they can call ahead; CHKD, for example, won’t sell used car seats and baby walkers due to safety concerns, Litton said. But CHKD stores will take clothing of all sizes, both in and out of season, as long as it’s not ripped or very stained. Shoes should be without holes and not too dirty (organizations often have limited cleaning abilities). Videos and DVDs should be in their original packages if possible.
Thrift stores and charities will provide tax write-offs and, if they operate as a store, may offer discounts to people who donate. Consignment stores typically will pay small amounts for used goods.
Some parents like to involve their kids in choosing items to give away or toss in the trash. Richardson, however, has found it’s easier to do toy purges when her kids, ages 3 to 13, aren’t around. “I have tried it both ways and when you include them, it just turns out to be very stressful for both of you,” she said. “My kids never want to part with anything.”
Either way, deciding what stays and goes requires reflecting on how important or useful it is to a child. When Richardson comes across a toy with a missing piece, for example, she asks herself two basic questions: How likely is it that I will ever find that piece, and do I want to make time to look for it? If the answer to the last question is no, the toy is out. If the answer is yes, she stops to look for the piece right then – and then gets rid of the toy if the hunt is unsuccessful.
Toys, of course, aren’t the only cause of kid clutter. Other common problems are coats and shoes, food messes and paperwork, including the many art projects that come home from school.
Sarah Jones, a Hampton mother of three, recently hung coat hooks in a low spot by the front door that even her youngest child, 5-year-old Gabby, can reach. “The kids now have to use them for their jackets and also to hang up their backpacks, so there’s not a huge pile of stuff at the door,” Jones said. “Gabby especially used to just walk into the kitchen and drop her coat in the middle of the floor.”
The Jones home also has a rule that everybody has to take off their shoes as soon as they come inside. “I’m not tripping over them quite as much as before,” she said. That rule is good for sanitary reasons, too, Richardson added: The majority of household germs enter on the bottom of people’s shoes.
Wall pockets – similar to those found in doctors’ offices – are other helpful additions to the front door area, Richardson said. Kids can use those for papers their parents need to see, such as field trip permission slips and homework that requires help.
As for all that artwork, Williams advises limiting displays to one piece per child at a time. The rest can go into a storage container near the display area; at the end of each semester, kids and parents can go through it together and pick their favorites. Those then can go into a box – Williams has used empty pizza boxes – labeled with the year and grade level. Items that don’t quite make the cut can turn into neat gifts for grandparents and other loved ones, as well as wrapping paper or greeting cards.
“If you do this for each of your children, artwork can be managed while letting the kids be a part of the organizing process,” Williams said.
For three-dimensional projects, she added, a good idea is to take a picture of the child holding the item rather than trying to hold on to the item itself.
When it comes to food, the best bet is to insist that kids eat only at the table, Richardson said. “Some parents allow children to wander around the house grazing on food,” she said. “Pretty soon, your woodwork is encrusted with week-old peanut butter and you’re finding chunky milk bottles under your couch.”
No matter how much work goes into organizing, some kid chaos will still reign. That’s why Richardson recommends that parents take about 10 minutes to tidy the house each night before going to bed –putting loose items back where they belong, sweeping up crumbs and wiping away any stains.
And last but definitely not least, experts say, kids need to learn to clean up their own messes. Very young children can start with simple chores such as to picking up their toys, throwing dirty clothes in the hamper, sorting laundry, bringing dirty dishes to the sink and dusting furniture. Their work might not be perfect, but they’ll feel good about pitching in like a “big person” – and even better, they may be less likely to have rooms that resemble hurricane zones when they get older.
“Let them help and accept a little imperfection,” Richardson said. “I have found that when you give chores to your children, they not only learn, but they become clutter-free adults.”
